2006-05-25
Cobra hearts.
I've planned a short trip down to San Francisco at the end of the summer, and I had all the details taken care of except for a place to stay. So, I called up The Ex to see if I could crash at his place and was forced to listen to his stories from his recent trip to Cambodia and Vietnam. Now, The Ex is what my grandmother calls "a gabber." The man can talk and talk, especially when it comes to himself, how cool he is, and how he can master a new language in the time it takes to cook a Pop Tart. Usually I can ignore his rants, but this time the variance between his antecdotes and mine was slightly more extreme:
The Ex:...and then I went swimming in the ocean, and went to a mud bath with these two British chicks I met, got a massage, tipped the hotel clerk twice her monthly salary, and then I went and ate a cobra's heart while it was still beating. What have you been up to?
Me: Not much. Working, mostly.
The Ex: Oh.
(Silence)
Me: Actually, we just moved offices at work, so now I'm...sitting in a new office.
The Ex: Huh. How's the new office?
Me: Nice. It has a window.
The Ex: A window, huh? That's cool.
Me: Yeah, not really...
Speaking of exciting work news (Ha!), there's something strange brewing within the company and it's put everyone on edge. First there's the move I previously mentioned, where they put half of us in other offices, but have left our old offices empty for "future projects". And then the big bosses have been paying extra attention to our affairs. And finally, my supervisor has randomly left for a month-long, extended "medical leave".
My guess? Pod people. I think to pad our shrinking funding, The Powers That Be at work have devised a plan to generate worker clones that they will sell for exorbitant prices.
That, or everyone is going to lose their job.
corin82 at 10:06 p.m.