2006-05-16
Flashbacks.
I spent a three-day weekend at my parent's house in Redding, which ended up being like any other time spent in Redding: boring, hot, and boring (with the exception of a long-distance phone call, which totally rocked, but I digress). Somehow I always fall for my mother's Jedi mind tricks and end up doing chores that I didn't even do while I was living there:
Mom: You know, your truck is just covered with pollen...it's practically green.
Me: I know, it's from all these damn trees. Stupid nature.
Mom: You should go rinse it off with the hose.
Me: Yeah, ok.
Mom: ...and since you'll be out there, why don't you rinse my car off too.
Me: Uhhh....sure.
Mom: And be sure to towel-dry the car, so there won't be any water spots. And maybe put a little wax on it too. And vacuum out the inside.
Me: Where do you keep the...Hey, wait a second...
Mom: Heh.
I met with someone interested in renting out my extra room, and I really hope that it isn't a sign of things to come. First of all, when we talked on the phone, she sounded just like an old hippie, probably because she was an old hippie. Who sells homemade jewlery for a living. Hemp and crystal jewlery. And proceeded to lecture me for twenty minutes about how she greatly respects her body's own "connection with the universe," followed by another ten minutes about how everyone on American Idol is extremely talented. Oh, it was painful.
But I can always count on my friends for helping me out with this roommate situation:
J: You know who is moving here and looking for a place?
Me: Who?
J: My brother.
Me: Wow, he's finally moving out of your parent's house, huh?
J: Well, he is 26. He should move in with you!
Me: You think your brother should move in with me? The same brother who took my viriginity, broke my heart and then treated me like crap? Yeah, I think I'll pass on that one.
And speaking of guys from the past, remember that cute bass player who lived in my dorm building about a hundred years ago? When I was driving home from Redding, I stopped a tiny coffee shop out in the middle of nowhere, and found him playing with his band. His born-again Christian band. And for some reason, he just doesn't look that attractive anymore.
And finally, an update of the Roommate Toilet Paper Standoff of 2006:
Sweet, sweet two-ply victory is mine.
corin82 at 11:02 p.m.